…9 pm “Hey Mom, the orchestra concert is tomorrow night and I NEED a [white/black/T with silkscreened logo] shirt” conversation with my daughter.

Usually followed by you’re tellimg me this NOW???

(blink)

“sorry, I forgot!”

well guess what!? Thanks to the miracle of too many vegetables and not enough chain smoking, your twiggy little body now fits into my clothes — and instead of a midnight Walmart run, I am going to simply dig through my closet and pull out the first [white/ black/ plaid] thing I can find.

Tell your orchestra teacher to stop giving you important information on pieces of paper, for god’s sake : P