October is not only “Sweater Month”, “Perfect Cup of Tea” time,?and “For God’s Sake Turn on the Heat Already” month, it is also the start of Migraine Season.? For those of you who are no stranger to this phenomenon, I bid you condolences.? For those who are wondering what I’m talking about, consider this a Public Service Announcement.? Your friend, colleague, or random stranger could be suffering from a migraine right now — here’s how you can tell, and what you should do about it.

Headache or Migraine, How to Tell:

1. Ask the person to describe the pain.? If they say “My head hurts”, they have a headache.? If they say “It feels like someone is plunging an ice pick into my eye socket and slowly turning it counter-clockwise”, then it is a Migraine.? In fact, the more graphically they can describe the pain, the worse off they are.

2. If the person carries on like Gollum about how “the light hurts them”, it’s a Migraine.

3. If they are standing in a dark room and they still complain about the light, and you ask why and they explain that it’s the light in their imagination, oh yeah, it’s a doozy.

What you should, and should not, do:

1. DO NOT, under any circumstances, decide that this would be a good night to watch TV or listen to the radio.? They may just summon up the strength to kill you.

2. DO NOT utter the words “oh, I have a headache too” in an attempt to be sympathetic.? They will kill you, but only because that’s what they think you want.

3. DO NOT expect them to cook/ clean/ find things for you for at least 24 hours.

4. DO offer them a hot bath, cup of tea, warm compress and/ or drug of their choice.? DON’T expect them to coherently appreciate this.? Anything other than outright shrieking should be construed as positive — keep on doing what your doing.

5. DO offer to give them a massage.? (hey, it might not help, but it can’t hurt, right?)

…..yours with love and tylenol, C.