Musings of Motherhood

They Grow Up So Fast

corsage1

okay, so it’s been a while since I posted — in case you haven’t been updated since, rest assured all is well!? My daughter is back in good health, and questionable taste in music.? In fact, she is preparing for her first formal dance tonight with The Boy.? The Boy, as in the one who is also My Student.? The one to whom, during the course of a phone conversation, she felt compelled to tell My Age.? As if she didn’t know this was breaking All Rules of Etiquette Whatsoever.? As if having my students believe I am 27 is a bad thing.? Even if it means the smart ones do the math and wonder for a split second if I really had her when I was 12.? Geeeeezzz.

But I digress.

Today was the day of The Dance.? Despite the fact that the dance is at night, preparations fully begin hours in advance.? Now I’m not saying she was nervous.? I’m also not saying she put her stockings on in the car, managed to ruin them in record time by puncturing her thumb right through while pulling them up, or that we had to make an emergency run to the nearest Rite Aid so she didn’t have a panic attack.? And I’m not mentioning that she blurted out? “DEODORANT!!!” at the top of her lungs as we were going 60 on the freeway as she remembered the other thing she forgot.

So while I didn’t say this, I did what all good moms do — found the one thing that would put her at ease: the Simon & Garfunkel CD.? We drove the rest of the way belting out “Ceeellllia… I’m down on my kneeees… I’m begging you pleeaase to come home…” with quirky smiles on our faces.

She got to The Boy’s house in good spirits, with only a quick flash of terror as the yippie dogs jumped on her 15 minute-old stockings.? She even took the obligatory “date pictures” semi-willingly.? And The Boy even bought her a lovely corsage.? Still, the “mom math” question remained: if the dance starts at 8pm, and dinner is at 6pm at Panera, where does the other hour and a half go?? (Let’s face it, even a teen can’t stretch a turkey sandwich out to more than half an hour.)

Turns out, The Boy decided to earn his cahones back.? After being beaten soundly at air hockey, (my daughter has an unbroken record,) he did what any good man would do — challenge her to a video game she has never heard of on his turf.? So she spent her “pre-dance” date time playing Call of Duty wearing an evening gown and no deodorant.

Which, I suspect, was exactly the way she would have wanted it.

Hell of a Week

ever have one of those weeks?? Where the roller coaster goes from zero to 60 to zero to backward to upside down and then gets stuck there? and you have to wait for five hours to get rescued?? and by “rescued”, I mean wait by the phone all afternoon to find out from the guy in the know if it’s bad news or really bad news?? Me TOO.

The week actually started off great — I got my copy of Studios in the mail, which was very exciting :}? (I’m on p. 118, cause, you know, you might look)? I took it in to show a colleague and one of my students got wind, and suddenly there were “high fives” all around? :}? (+5 because students are not known for thinking teachers are professionals.? Or actual people, most of the time.? They tend to believe we either sleep at school, or live in a box.)

Then… the blizzard hit.

Then… I found out I received a rather nice commission that I can’t really tell you about yet, but is quite exciting : }

Then… 12 more inches of snow and 2 more hours of shoveling.

Thursday was the ENDURE exhibit, a lovely event hosted by e4b, a beautiful office design showroom.? Had a chance to talk with some wonderful people, 90% of whose names have unfortunately escaped me.? (And by “escaped me” I mean I really really tried to learn them, but it is a skill I do not possess.? And by “90%” I mean give or take 10%.)

Then Friday hit.? Message on my cell that my daughter, who should be at school, is in the Emergency room.? Doing nothing even remotely educational.? In fact quite the opposite, as they were turning her little brain to mush by giving her loopy drugs that made her completely incoherent.? Meningitis was tossed around as a possible culprit, after she spiked a massive fever.? They confirmed bronchitis & influenza, but her dad opted out of the invasive meningitis test, which involves puncturing a hole in her spine (gahhhh).? Instead we’re on round-the-clock surveillance and high doses of meds to keep her fever in check til we go back in next week.? I’m not sure I’m qualified to monitor any kind of medical condition, but here I am.? Thoughts, suggestions, and bad jokes welcome.

Deck the (teachers who ask for passes in the) Halls

This is gonna be a convoluted post; I’ll warn you ahead of time.? It will be kind of like one of those TV shows where the story line is so full of “intrigue” that it doesn’t really have a plot, and you can’t figure out who the characters are supposed to be so you just sit there and half watch with a confused look on your face.? (Okay, that would probably be more me than you.? Which is why I never watch TV.? You probably would have no problem understanding things and would just pray I didn’t ask stupid questions during the good parts.? But I digress.)? I’ll provide plenty of footnotes so you (er, I) can keep track.*

Long story short:**

Today was Christmas.***? My dad (who knows best), got his soon-to-be-out-of-work-teacher (me) just what she needed most: a Student.? BOY was I surprised.? I would have been fine with a sweater or bath products, but hey.****? Said Student and I had a great time reminiscing about the Good Old Days***** when he and Juvenile Delinquent sat together in my class.******? Turns out Student lives right behind my dad, and has been coming over regularly for guitar lessons.*******? We deemed him a Nice Boy, and sentenced him to play my daughter at air hockey (who before today had never lost to anyone in the state of Ohio, and has been quite unbearable about it).

…and a lovely time was had by all : ) ………………………….. C.
………………………………………………………………………………..

* cause I kinda want to see how many asterisks I can use in a single post : )? (no worries; it’s just a phase)
** Don’t you LOVE it when people say “Long story short…” and then proceed to give you a long story??? Me TOO.
*** Today was New Years.? But since everybody had the dreaded Pink Eye during Christmas, we decided to postpone Christmas to the next available holiday.
**** He also got me a HD gift card, and a free “phone-a-dad” request for help on a home improvement project.? (you know me soo well… : ) )
***** which weren’t old at all, and neither is he
****** JD was simultaneously one of two students in my teaching career that came verrry close to punching my lights out, and also one of an elite handful who has repeatedly come back to tell me how great I was.? enjoy the irony.? I know I have.
******* …and free food
******** Student – 1; Daughter – 3.? It’s a start.

Now it’s time for the 10th annual…

…9 pm “Hey Mom, the orchestra concert is tomorrow night and I NEED a [white/black/T with silkscreened logo] shirt” conversation with my daughter.

Usually followed by you’re tellimg me this NOW???

(blink)

“sorry, I forgot!”

well guess what!? Thanks to the miracle of too many vegetables and not enough chain smoking, your twiggy little body now fits into my clothes — and instead of a midnight Walmart run, I am going to simply dig through my closet and pull out the first [white/ black/ plaid] thing I can find.

Tell your orchestra teacher to stop giving you important information on pieces of paper, for god’s sake : P

Kids These Days

Sam bday 2009 My daughter officially turned 15 last night.? (And I officially became OLD.? Although I’m certain she’s aging in dog years compared to me — or me to her??)? Of course as a 15 year old, she had to have a ParTay, and of course that meant inviting several other teenage buggers as well.? So how many to invite… how about 10.? TEN?? Only Ten? Okay, 12? 12.? Twelve?? Yes, 12. 12 is good.? She gives me a look like I’m asking her to disown the rest.? But she won’t tell me how many the “rest” is.

Now, I love teenagers.? I really do.? I work with hundreds of them every day, and it’s the best part of my job.? They’re kinda like adults, only quirkier, and they ramble a little more when they talk.? And unlike adults, when they start blathering on about some random topic or another of which you care absolutely nothing about, you can stop them in their tracks just by saying “Would you just sit down and shut up already?” and they will totally respect you for it.*? If it’s an adult doing the blathering, you have to feign interest and periodically say things like “oh yeah, those crazy [Democrats/ Republicans/ Cavs/ Buckeyes]” and wait it out.

And honestly, it’s not the teenager part of “having teenagers in my house” part that gets me; it’s the house part. As in, I want it to exist — status quo — when I’m back down to one.? So we narrow it down to 16, which by last night turned into 20. **

Now that it’s over, I have to say it wasn’t so bad : )? Like I said, they really are quite pleasant, quirky people.? Even if they can scarf down more frozen pizzas than I can fit in my freezer.? They don’t even care that was crappy pizza.? They say things like “Sweet!” and “Thank you!” and “Cool, there’s more!”? Cause with teenagers, it’s about the little things.? Little things make them feel good, and little things make them feel bad.? That’s why they’re so melodramatic.? They’re just experiencing every nuance that life has to offer.

When it came to my daughter’s presents, it was definitely the little things that made her day.? Like the bright red lipstick and nail polish she got from her best friend.? I’m sure it was a joke and not (dear lord) to wear, and the fact that it was wrapped in 2.6 miles of duct tape made it even more special.? And the helium balloon that the boy down the street got her that made her squeal like a 3 year old again.? And the shoes a friend gave her, I’m pretty sure just because she borrowed them one too many times.? And the faux mehendi I did using an eyeliner pencil was special enough for her to beg for a touch-up at the end of the evening.

I think what most sticks in my mind is how diverse the party was.? When I attended high school, there was no real diversity.? Everyone was caucasian, and most shared a similar heritage and religious tradition.? It wasn’t until I went to college that I really learned about other cultures, and I remember being utterly amazed by it all.? I made friends from literally around the globe, and they challenged my perceptions completely.? To see my daughter just entering high school surrounded by life-long friends of all colors and backgrounds was comforting; to know that she is open and accepting just because she couldn’t imagine otherwise, even better.

The whole evening (after three loads of dishes, two bags of recycling, and an hour and a half disinfecting) was not so bad after all.? Maybe, just maybe, we’ll do it again next year.? Cause you know, kids these days… they’re pretty okay.

……. with love and warm fuzzies and a clean house, C.

*Please know that I would NEVER do this.? (to your child.) (if you were watching.)

** this, by the way, is “teen math”.? It’s how they multiply when you aren’t paying attention.